After life, when the death comes..

I was becoming quiet thinking of what I have heard.

Since I heard what it is like the life after.. When the death comes

Note: this is only for Muslim!

The ustadz said that the dead people is like drowning people. They search for help.

Why I become quite?

I am not ready... I have none as my saving for the life after.

If my time comes, nothing that I feel can save me from becoming drowning.

Not yet that I have (a) kid(s) to pray for me, Not that I have knowledge that has been useful for others, Not that I have done lots of sadaqah.

I am not ready... I want my life to be useful for others in the mercy of Allah.

I do not want to be drowning without help.

I want to have Allah's mercy, here in the world and after....

It is not an easy journey. 

Instead, I still need Allah's mercy in this world. 

Life has been difficult lately, I feel empty. 

I am tired with the people around me. 

What have I done that everything come at the same time?

I wish I have all the power to face things, to deal with things and make my life more meaningful to others.